Friday, September 26, 2008

List...


I have come to realize that my life is mainly composed of list. I don't really write them all down but I have them scrolling in my head constantly. I am always thinking of what I need to do and what I have done and what might come up and on and on and on.... Sometimes I wonder if my head is gonna explode because I think to much and over think way too much! I have given myself a challenge in that I will try to not perfect everything and to try and stop worrying so much about things I can't control, and maybe not control the things I can, too much. I had my break down day yesterday for probably the sum of half the day all I did was cry. Why was I crying... I'm not sure I have just one answer for that, it was ALOT that just all of a sudden hit me. I am both physically and mentally exhausted for one thing and my body just couldn't handle it anymore I think so it had to let go. I only get maybe 4 hours of sleep a night and it's wearing me down. It made me feel better to get it out and today I feel as if I'm back to the normal me or at least the half normal me..lol:) Sometimes I just wanna yell and scream at the top of my lungs "do you know how hard this really is..." I know some understand and are going through it too so at least I feel a little company in my craziness. Our household if going to change big time in a week...wow a week seems like so long then it seems so fast. I'm looking forward to it and also wondering just what it's really gonna be like, time will tell. Logan's open house was Tues. night he did great and is learning so much! As for an update on the house, they finished the footers today and are going to start the block on Monday! Maybe this thing might get done in 4 months after all:) Next week is busy...we have school Mon. & Tues. then Logan has the rest of the week off, dentist on Wed. and then Riley's B-Day on Fri.! It's gonna be nice to have something to do everyday so I'm not here overwhelming myself with my list in my head and over thinking about what we need and what we have...which I'll probably do anyway but I'm really going to try and not over think it..so we'll see. I leave with some pics of the progress on the house, it's not nothing spectacular but knowing what the finished product will look like, it looks like the best thing in the world:) Going to spend time with the men I LOVE my Lil' munchkin and Christopher!

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